Post by Keely on Apr 6, 2006 15:55:52 GMT -5
I'm thinking this story is a chic-flick but u tell me what u think. I would like a suggestion for a genre this would be. I had to cut alot of stuff out for my English class and it pained me to do that but I guess it was kinda good cuz when I really look at it, some of it was crap. i really wanted that rabbit part to stay in there but people said it wasn't necessary. u probably would of found the rabbit part cute, maybe a little funny too:
Deceit
I am sitting in my room thinking about all the things I had done wrong. I don’t know why I am still in my room when it hurts just to look around here. The pictures of the guys I had so cared about were just a distant memory. Why did I choose to let him go? I have no idea. It just doesn’t feel right. I know that isn’t like me. Before, I wouldn’t let him go no matter what but now I don’t know what’s going on with me. I feel like a completely different person. If only I could change my actions in the past….
“Mom! I’m going out!” I yelled rushing to the door. “Have-“ I zoomed out the door before she could finish. “Fun.” Cruising in my Dodge Viper, feeling the wind in my hair, I was headed to the mall. Parking was terrible! After a few minutes, I finally got a place to park and rushed inside. They had just got a Mountain View Diner in the mall so we took the opportunity to meet there. I was waiting outside the diner for a long time. To my surprise, who did appear? Not Josh but Raviv. He said he got my letter, saw me around town sometimes and was waiting to meet me. My first thought was what was he doing here in Frederick? I thought that was rude asking that, but my mind jumped the gun too quickly and I found myself asking anyway. “What are you doing here in Frederick of all places?” “Well, my agents arranged me to do a tour for my fans here in Maryland and I thought this would be a perfect chance to come to your city and meet you.” “Me? You wanted to meet me? I’m just a dorky fan. You can’t possibly have feelings for me, do you?” “Does this answer your question?” “Wha---“ My reaction was interrupted as he gave me the most passionate kiss that anyone has ever seen in their life. Forget the movies and television! This was even better!!! I couldn’t stop. He’s just so hot and sweet that I could kiss him forever. We felt like someone was watching us so we broke free. We looked to see who it was. “I thought I would always be your one and only but I was stupid to think that you’d truly love a guy like me.” Josh walked away with tears in his eyes. Raviv looked like he was ready for more. “Josh! WAIT!” He just kept walking. “Will you excuse me for a moment?” I ran after him as fast as I could but he had already gone out the mall. My only chance was to sprint so I did. I finally caught up to him just as he was about to get in the car and pull away so I did the only thing I could think of, which was pulling him towards me so we could talk face to face. “Don’t even try to explain. I know what’s going on” “Believe it or not, he kissed me.” “Sure, why should I believe that?” He paused. “You know, I have to think about this. I’m not sure our relationship is going anywhere.” “Oh Josh. I’m sorry. I should have resisted him.” I attempted to hug him to make him feel better. He softly pushed me away. “I don’t know what to think. I mean, why would he kiss you?” “I don’t know but I’m telling the truth.” Raviv appeared right beside me. “Listen man. She’s right. It was my fault.” “No, no it was my fault. I need to have control.” “No seriously I kissed her. I’m sorry if I ruined your relationship. Now, I’ll just leave you two to talk alone.” He walked away. “So?” “So if you got Raviv to love you, maybe I should pursue Hilary Duff. If a guy like Raviv loves you, then anything can happen. I have to think long and hard about this. Bye.” I stood frozen watching him drive off wondering if I was ever going to see him again. Raviv came back. “Hey. So how’d it go?” Still not moving, I said, “It didn’t.” “Huh?” I jolted back to reality. “Oh. He said, he needs to think about this.” “Uh-oh. Nothing good ever comes out of that. Anytime us guys say that, that’s when you gotta worry.” “Yeah. I was afraid of that.” “Listen I know this isn’t the right time to say this but I was wondering if we could hang out a little longer. “I don’t know.” “Maybe come to your house, cheer you up.” I just stood there not saying anything. “Sorry, was that rude of me to offer?” “No. I guess not.” “So what do you say?” “Sure, it’s better than just sitting by my lonesome.” “Ok. I’ll come over about 1: 00. That okay?” “Yeah, I’d like that.”
Was I doing the right thing? I could not sit by myself thinking about Josh crying my eyes out when there was nothing I could do about it. It was his decision. Alright, I guess I better be prepared for when Raviv comes over. I do not even know myself anymore. Raviv not cheer me up? That’s just not like me. I greet Raviv at the door. “Hey come in. Sorry about the mess. I should have cleaned up, knowing that you’re a neat freak.” “No that’s ok.” “You wanna come in my room?” “You sure? You won’t feel uneasy with me in your room?” “No besides my room is a much better atmosphere.” “Ok then”
We sat on the bed and I turned the TV on. I decided to turn on his show and ask him to analyze himself. I was merely just kidding but he analyzed himself thinking I was serious but it made it funny. Well I’ve had enough of this. I turn to Grounded For Life. While we were watching, Raviv’s hands crept up on me and he pulled me close. Whoa, he’s being a little too flirty. I immensely laugh enjoying the moment. I forgot I gave Josh a key to my house and he walked in on us. Raviv stops, noticing he was standing there, watching the whole incident. “WHAT? I told you I’d think about it. I didn’t mean that we were over. I was even considering forgetting about the whole thing and we would pick up where we left off.” “Are we over?” “All I can say is I do not want to see you for a very long time.” “I’m sorry. We got caught up in the moment.” “I’m sorry too for trusting you. It hurts me to leave but I’m afraid I have to in order to retain my dignity.” “When will I see you again?” “I don’t know but I have to go.” He left. He didn’t even say goodbye let alone hug me. He must be uber-upset at me. “You enjoyed what I did, didn’t you?” “Yeah I’m afraid so.” A week later, Raviv came over looking like he needed to tell me something. Oh no this is crucial. He has a really serious look on his face. Is he going to pop the question? I sure hope not. I’m not ready. Not after I had my heart broken. “Hey I saw something shocking in the paper. You might want to read it.” “Shocking as in surprising? Or the negative kind of shocking?” “Read for yourself and you’ll find out.” “Ok” I looked in the newspaper on the front page. Reading it aloud, “Guess who Hilary Duff married? Not Jessie McCartney. In fact not even a celebrity, some normal person named Joshua Maurs.” I paused trying to take it all in. “NO WAY!!” I am not looking at this ever again! I threw the newspaper across the room and it almost made it in the trashcan. Raviv came to my side attempting to comfort me. He gently put his arm around my neck pulling me close and rubbing my shoulder. I was a little freaked out at first but after a while I felt secure and cried in his arms. After a few days, I slowly moved on. We would have the time of our life; watching movies, surfing the net, playing with my rabbit and embracing each other’s company. After a few months, of course he had come over as usual but he looked as serious as when he handed me that newspaper. Whatever news he gives me can’t be worse than the news before. “Another article in the newspaper?” “Nope, don’t have the paper this time.” “What do you have to tell me?” I asked nervous and excited at the same time. Apparently he’s more nervous than I am. He kneeled down on front of me. “Heidi Lynn Getzandanner, will you marry me?” As soon as he said that, he opened the box showing the most beautiful ring I had ever seen. I was speechless. I knew from Raviv’s look that he was waiting for an answer. “Gee I…I dunno.” I want to say yes but it just doesn’t feel right. Raviv was on the verge of tears. I thought about it for a second. “Yes I definitely will,” I answered sincerely. After being married for about 4 months and living in the most beautiful and huge house you had ever seen, I say “Raviv something feels amiss.” “What?” “I can’t really say….I think…Don’t you remember Nathalie Portman?” “Yeah. What about her?” “Didn’t you..you know think that you and her were meant to be?” “Yeah I used to.” Just as he said that, a knock was heard at the door. “I better get it. It’s probably another crazy fan.” “You sure you don’t want me to get it?” “If you want to.” I went downstairs and opened the door. “Josh wha--what are you doing here? I thought you didn’t ever want to see me again.” “No, I said I didn’t want to see you for a long time. I didn’t say never. Yeah so I thought about our relationship and we can---“ Noticing my wedding ring, he said, “What is that?” I hid my hand and said “Nothing”. “No it’s something all right.” And he brought my hand to him quickly before I could resist, looking closely at the ring. “Aha! That is a wedding ring! Who on earth would you get married to?” As Raviv came downstairs, he said, “So you couldn’t get rid of that fan yet sweetheart?” He stopped halfway down the steps noticing Josh and the disappointed look on his face. “Oops, I better get going now, don’t wanna get home late” he said pretending to go out the door. He was just about to go behind Josh when Josh stood in front of him. “Stop the act! I know you too are married.” Looking at me, he explained, “This time the breakup is official.” “Wait please” I begged and whispered sweetingly “Joshy.” “No it’s not gonna work. I’m sorry. I may have married Hilary Duff but we never did anything. You love Raviv more than me and don’t say you don’t cuz I know you do.” Before I could try and stop him, he disappeared behind the corner. I slammed the door somewhat mad at myself.
What happened here? I don’t know but this whole thing was a bad idea. Maybe I shouldn’t have married him. Even though this happened just a few hours ago, it has changed my life. A few minutes really matter. I’m not sure why I make decisions like this based on my mind and not my heart.
I look up from my daze. Raviv is shaking his hand in front of my face, “If you’re back on earth now, do you still want to go upstairs?” Sighing, I say, “Alright, hopefully that’ll cheer me up” We walked upstairs into our bedroom. Raviv encouraged me to sit in his lap so I did and as usual he tried to comfort me. “Snugglebunny” “Yeah?” “I think this isn’t working out. You and me aren’t meant to be” “Why do you say that?” “Because I’m not truly happy. The magic is gone. You belong with Nathalie” “You’re not serious? You want to divorce me after all the time we spent together? But after I met you, I didn’t care about her anymore.” “You may think that now but once you’re with Nathalie, you’ll be happy.” “But you won’t be happy. Josh is not coming back. Your happiness is all that matters.” “I wanna get you hooked up with Nathalie” So we both went to file the divorce and then I thought of how I could get him and Nathalie together. “Get some money, we’re gonna go to the Star Wars premiere.” “Alright” I drove us there. We finally saw Nathalie. “I’ll go up to her first. You stay behind.” “Ok?” I ran up to her pretending to be an overly excited obsessed fan. “HI, Nathalie! I’m a huge fan and I was wondering if you could meet someone and spend a few hours of your time with them.” Nathalie confused said “Ok. Bring them over and I’ll see.” Waving Raviv over, I said “Come on. Why are you so shy? You’re never this shy.” Now he’s telling me to come over. Ok? I said “One sec Nathalie.” and walked over to Raviv. “What’s the matter, Raviv?” “This is Nathalie we’re talking about. I’m really shy around my crushes. I don’t know if I can do this. Why did we divorce anyway?” “Come on, shy little boy.” And with all my might I pulled him to Nathalie. “Ok Nathalie this is Raviv Ullman.” Nathalie smiled. She looked as if she was lost in his eyes but she quickly said something. “Hey, I know you. You play Phil on Phil of the Future right?” “Yeah.” “I’ll leave you two alone.” I went home and automatically turned on the TV. At first I wasn’t watching but then Raviv on the TV caught my eye and I saw his wedding with Nathalie. I wanted to see how it would go so I became interested in it. The paparazzi was there interrogating Raviv. “Mr. Ullman, I thought you were involved with another special woman.” “Yes but she decided to break it off because she believed we weren’t meant to be.” Raviv happily said “You bet I do” minutes later. I turned the TV off satisfied. “My work here is done.” I was about to break into tears but suddenly; I heard a knock on the door. “Josh what are you doing here? If you’re thinking about being friends forget it.” “No I’m not. Uh, I saw the wedding on TV.” “You did?” “Yeah and I figured out that Raviv was talking about you divorcing him. So if it’s ok, can we go back to where we left off?” “What are you saying?” “I understand if you don’t want to but….I was hoping that you and me, uh, we could be a couple again?” “Yeah sure.” So it was decided. We went out together every weekend having the best time of our life, not a care in the world. A year later, Josh came over like he always did but this time he looked like he had something important to tell me. “Um, Heidi?” “Yeah?” “Ok I’m just gonna do this…Will you….will you marry me?” Every time a guy asks me this, maybe because I’m surprised, but I never say anything right away. “I’m sorry I wasn’t formal in asking but uh….” “Yes! Yes I will Josh.” And for the first time in my life, I kissed him.
Deceit
I am sitting in my room thinking about all the things I had done wrong. I don’t know why I am still in my room when it hurts just to look around here. The pictures of the guys I had so cared about were just a distant memory. Why did I choose to let him go? I have no idea. It just doesn’t feel right. I know that isn’t like me. Before, I wouldn’t let him go no matter what but now I don’t know what’s going on with me. I feel like a completely different person. If only I could change my actions in the past….
“Mom! I’m going out!” I yelled rushing to the door. “Have-“ I zoomed out the door before she could finish. “Fun.” Cruising in my Dodge Viper, feeling the wind in my hair, I was headed to the mall. Parking was terrible! After a few minutes, I finally got a place to park and rushed inside. They had just got a Mountain View Diner in the mall so we took the opportunity to meet there. I was waiting outside the diner for a long time. To my surprise, who did appear? Not Josh but Raviv. He said he got my letter, saw me around town sometimes and was waiting to meet me. My first thought was what was he doing here in Frederick? I thought that was rude asking that, but my mind jumped the gun too quickly and I found myself asking anyway. “What are you doing here in Frederick of all places?” “Well, my agents arranged me to do a tour for my fans here in Maryland and I thought this would be a perfect chance to come to your city and meet you.” “Me? You wanted to meet me? I’m just a dorky fan. You can’t possibly have feelings for me, do you?” “Does this answer your question?” “Wha---“ My reaction was interrupted as he gave me the most passionate kiss that anyone has ever seen in their life. Forget the movies and television! This was even better!!! I couldn’t stop. He’s just so hot and sweet that I could kiss him forever. We felt like someone was watching us so we broke free. We looked to see who it was. “I thought I would always be your one and only but I was stupid to think that you’d truly love a guy like me.” Josh walked away with tears in his eyes. Raviv looked like he was ready for more. “Josh! WAIT!” He just kept walking. “Will you excuse me for a moment?” I ran after him as fast as I could but he had already gone out the mall. My only chance was to sprint so I did. I finally caught up to him just as he was about to get in the car and pull away so I did the only thing I could think of, which was pulling him towards me so we could talk face to face. “Don’t even try to explain. I know what’s going on” “Believe it or not, he kissed me.” “Sure, why should I believe that?” He paused. “You know, I have to think about this. I’m not sure our relationship is going anywhere.” “Oh Josh. I’m sorry. I should have resisted him.” I attempted to hug him to make him feel better. He softly pushed me away. “I don’t know what to think. I mean, why would he kiss you?” “I don’t know but I’m telling the truth.” Raviv appeared right beside me. “Listen man. She’s right. It was my fault.” “No, no it was my fault. I need to have control.” “No seriously I kissed her. I’m sorry if I ruined your relationship. Now, I’ll just leave you two to talk alone.” He walked away. “So?” “So if you got Raviv to love you, maybe I should pursue Hilary Duff. If a guy like Raviv loves you, then anything can happen. I have to think long and hard about this. Bye.” I stood frozen watching him drive off wondering if I was ever going to see him again. Raviv came back. “Hey. So how’d it go?” Still not moving, I said, “It didn’t.” “Huh?” I jolted back to reality. “Oh. He said, he needs to think about this.” “Uh-oh. Nothing good ever comes out of that. Anytime us guys say that, that’s when you gotta worry.” “Yeah. I was afraid of that.” “Listen I know this isn’t the right time to say this but I was wondering if we could hang out a little longer. “I don’t know.” “Maybe come to your house, cheer you up.” I just stood there not saying anything. “Sorry, was that rude of me to offer?” “No. I guess not.” “So what do you say?” “Sure, it’s better than just sitting by my lonesome.” “Ok. I’ll come over about 1: 00. That okay?” “Yeah, I’d like that.”
Was I doing the right thing? I could not sit by myself thinking about Josh crying my eyes out when there was nothing I could do about it. It was his decision. Alright, I guess I better be prepared for when Raviv comes over. I do not even know myself anymore. Raviv not cheer me up? That’s just not like me. I greet Raviv at the door. “Hey come in. Sorry about the mess. I should have cleaned up, knowing that you’re a neat freak.” “No that’s ok.” “You wanna come in my room?” “You sure? You won’t feel uneasy with me in your room?” “No besides my room is a much better atmosphere.” “Ok then”
We sat on the bed and I turned the TV on. I decided to turn on his show and ask him to analyze himself. I was merely just kidding but he analyzed himself thinking I was serious but it made it funny. Well I’ve had enough of this. I turn to Grounded For Life. While we were watching, Raviv’s hands crept up on me and he pulled me close. Whoa, he’s being a little too flirty. I immensely laugh enjoying the moment. I forgot I gave Josh a key to my house and he walked in on us. Raviv stops, noticing he was standing there, watching the whole incident. “WHAT? I told you I’d think about it. I didn’t mean that we were over. I was even considering forgetting about the whole thing and we would pick up where we left off.” “Are we over?” “All I can say is I do not want to see you for a very long time.” “I’m sorry. We got caught up in the moment.” “I’m sorry too for trusting you. It hurts me to leave but I’m afraid I have to in order to retain my dignity.” “When will I see you again?” “I don’t know but I have to go.” He left. He didn’t even say goodbye let alone hug me. He must be uber-upset at me. “You enjoyed what I did, didn’t you?” “Yeah I’m afraid so.” A week later, Raviv came over looking like he needed to tell me something. Oh no this is crucial. He has a really serious look on his face. Is he going to pop the question? I sure hope not. I’m not ready. Not after I had my heart broken. “Hey I saw something shocking in the paper. You might want to read it.” “Shocking as in surprising? Or the negative kind of shocking?” “Read for yourself and you’ll find out.” “Ok” I looked in the newspaper on the front page. Reading it aloud, “Guess who Hilary Duff married? Not Jessie McCartney. In fact not even a celebrity, some normal person named Joshua Maurs.” I paused trying to take it all in. “NO WAY!!” I am not looking at this ever again! I threw the newspaper across the room and it almost made it in the trashcan. Raviv came to my side attempting to comfort me. He gently put his arm around my neck pulling me close and rubbing my shoulder. I was a little freaked out at first but after a while I felt secure and cried in his arms. After a few days, I slowly moved on. We would have the time of our life; watching movies, surfing the net, playing with my rabbit and embracing each other’s company. After a few months, of course he had come over as usual but he looked as serious as when he handed me that newspaper. Whatever news he gives me can’t be worse than the news before. “Another article in the newspaper?” “Nope, don’t have the paper this time.” “What do you have to tell me?” I asked nervous and excited at the same time. Apparently he’s more nervous than I am. He kneeled down on front of me. “Heidi Lynn Getzandanner, will you marry me?” As soon as he said that, he opened the box showing the most beautiful ring I had ever seen. I was speechless. I knew from Raviv’s look that he was waiting for an answer. “Gee I…I dunno.” I want to say yes but it just doesn’t feel right. Raviv was on the verge of tears. I thought about it for a second. “Yes I definitely will,” I answered sincerely. After being married for about 4 months and living in the most beautiful and huge house you had ever seen, I say “Raviv something feels amiss.” “What?” “I can’t really say….I think…Don’t you remember Nathalie Portman?” “Yeah. What about her?” “Didn’t you..you know think that you and her were meant to be?” “Yeah I used to.” Just as he said that, a knock was heard at the door. “I better get it. It’s probably another crazy fan.” “You sure you don’t want me to get it?” “If you want to.” I went downstairs and opened the door. “Josh wha--what are you doing here? I thought you didn’t ever want to see me again.” “No, I said I didn’t want to see you for a long time. I didn’t say never. Yeah so I thought about our relationship and we can---“ Noticing my wedding ring, he said, “What is that?” I hid my hand and said “Nothing”. “No it’s something all right.” And he brought my hand to him quickly before I could resist, looking closely at the ring. “Aha! That is a wedding ring! Who on earth would you get married to?” As Raviv came downstairs, he said, “So you couldn’t get rid of that fan yet sweetheart?” He stopped halfway down the steps noticing Josh and the disappointed look on his face. “Oops, I better get going now, don’t wanna get home late” he said pretending to go out the door. He was just about to go behind Josh when Josh stood in front of him. “Stop the act! I know you too are married.” Looking at me, he explained, “This time the breakup is official.” “Wait please” I begged and whispered sweetingly “Joshy.” “No it’s not gonna work. I’m sorry. I may have married Hilary Duff but we never did anything. You love Raviv more than me and don’t say you don’t cuz I know you do.” Before I could try and stop him, he disappeared behind the corner. I slammed the door somewhat mad at myself.
What happened here? I don’t know but this whole thing was a bad idea. Maybe I shouldn’t have married him. Even though this happened just a few hours ago, it has changed my life. A few minutes really matter. I’m not sure why I make decisions like this based on my mind and not my heart.
I look up from my daze. Raviv is shaking his hand in front of my face, “If you’re back on earth now, do you still want to go upstairs?” Sighing, I say, “Alright, hopefully that’ll cheer me up” We walked upstairs into our bedroom. Raviv encouraged me to sit in his lap so I did and as usual he tried to comfort me. “Snugglebunny” “Yeah?” “I think this isn’t working out. You and me aren’t meant to be” “Why do you say that?” “Because I’m not truly happy. The magic is gone. You belong with Nathalie” “You’re not serious? You want to divorce me after all the time we spent together? But after I met you, I didn’t care about her anymore.” “You may think that now but once you’re with Nathalie, you’ll be happy.” “But you won’t be happy. Josh is not coming back. Your happiness is all that matters.” “I wanna get you hooked up with Nathalie” So we both went to file the divorce and then I thought of how I could get him and Nathalie together. “Get some money, we’re gonna go to the Star Wars premiere.” “Alright” I drove us there. We finally saw Nathalie. “I’ll go up to her first. You stay behind.” “Ok?” I ran up to her pretending to be an overly excited obsessed fan. “HI, Nathalie! I’m a huge fan and I was wondering if you could meet someone and spend a few hours of your time with them.” Nathalie confused said “Ok. Bring them over and I’ll see.” Waving Raviv over, I said “Come on. Why are you so shy? You’re never this shy.” Now he’s telling me to come over. Ok? I said “One sec Nathalie.” and walked over to Raviv. “What’s the matter, Raviv?” “This is Nathalie we’re talking about. I’m really shy around my crushes. I don’t know if I can do this. Why did we divorce anyway?” “Come on, shy little boy.” And with all my might I pulled him to Nathalie. “Ok Nathalie this is Raviv Ullman.” Nathalie smiled. She looked as if she was lost in his eyes but she quickly said something. “Hey, I know you. You play Phil on Phil of the Future right?” “Yeah.” “I’ll leave you two alone.” I went home and automatically turned on the TV. At first I wasn’t watching but then Raviv on the TV caught my eye and I saw his wedding with Nathalie. I wanted to see how it would go so I became interested in it. The paparazzi was there interrogating Raviv. “Mr. Ullman, I thought you were involved with another special woman.” “Yes but she decided to break it off because she believed we weren’t meant to be.” Raviv happily said “You bet I do” minutes later. I turned the TV off satisfied. “My work here is done.” I was about to break into tears but suddenly; I heard a knock on the door. “Josh what are you doing here? If you’re thinking about being friends forget it.” “No I’m not. Uh, I saw the wedding on TV.” “You did?” “Yeah and I figured out that Raviv was talking about you divorcing him. So if it’s ok, can we go back to where we left off?” “What are you saying?” “I understand if you don’t want to but….I was hoping that you and me, uh, we could be a couple again?” “Yeah sure.” So it was decided. We went out together every weekend having the best time of our life, not a care in the world. A year later, Josh came over like he always did but this time he looked like he had something important to tell me. “Um, Heidi?” “Yeah?” “Ok I’m just gonna do this…Will you….will you marry me?” Every time a guy asks me this, maybe because I’m surprised, but I never say anything right away. “I’m sorry I wasn’t formal in asking but uh….” “Yes! Yes I will Josh.” And for the first time in my life, I kissed him.
